A New Thing

As an aspiring writer, I feel certain feelings and I turn them into stories that could inspire my readers to feel that feeling.

It's like a capsule, or a pill, that my readers can take, labelled "sweet happiness" or "rushing anger".

But I've never written a romance before. I can't say I haven't taken someone else's pill labelled "heartbreaking joy", but I myself don't know how to write something like that.

Recently, though, I found myself sitting at my desk, my bed, anything that could serve as a table, pen in hand, paper blank. Thinking and pondering over how to write a romance. How to take the feelings and turn them into another bright pill that would preserve and share the memory.

How does one show something pure, when the purity somewhat lies in the fact that it's humble? That it's not on display for the world to see?

If I were to label this pill it wouldn't be "belongingness". It wouldn't even be "security". Because I am secure in my identity in Christ, and I belong with Him. I wouldn't know what to name this pill, felt for an actual person.

It's a new thing, and I'm excited to learn more about it. And maybe one day, I will be able to put it into words and write my romance, but as of now, I'll just study it from afar.

Partially Done with Junior Year

I started this blog for a class in my first year in high school. I was a gawky kid with no friends, and an angry heart at those who could change the world but instead invested their time in trying to fit in.

Have things changed since then? Since them?

I don't think so. And yet, I do think so. I'm still gawky, and I still don't like people who waste their potential. But I've gained something from those 6 years since first year high school.

I've found things out about myself that I both love and don't love.

I'm different, and yet I'm the same. It's hard to explain.

Life tells you to discard the people who don't benefit you. The ones who suck the life out of you. I say don't. I agree that you probably shouldn't hang around them too much if their negative vibes are overwhelming, but at the same time, don't give up on them. Hope for them. See their potential and pray for them. And when you can, help them.

God has been supremely faithful to me these past few years. Instead of me being blown away by the world, the world has been spinning past me and God. With Him, I could face anything blown my way. And I know that without Him, I may have gotten the approval of the world, and of the Devil, but it would have bitten me in the back and killed me in the long run.

The tears I cry are tears for the world, not tears for myself. I cry when I feel depressed, and cry harder because I know there are people like me who feel a hundred times more depressed and they have no God to comfort them.

People dis my God. They say that He's useless, that He just wants your praise, that He's selfish. What, may I ask, has He done that's been a con for me? He has provided me with a home, He has given me the friends I have now. He has sustained me, He has been my strength.

Does He really not listen when you call? Think again.

You can take a risk with your life and jump off a cliff 50 feet into a lake, but you can't try to spend one day of your life to call on Him genuinely?

Well.

It's funny, I was going to make this blog about how sick I was at the end of 3rd year college Intersession. Literally, sick. My nose is sniffing away as I write this. I must have gone to the bathroom more times today than I have in the past 2 months.

- Jenna Selim/Hanadar

Nick Pitera

I really, really like Nick Pitera. Mahn that guy is talented.
I first heard his Les Miserables cover and was amused by it. I never looked for it again, but I accidentally found his Disney medley and fell in love. Heh, he even sings better than me.
If you've never heard him, go now to YouTube and type him in. I suggest you try his Disney medley first though.

Oh, and to support him, go get his first original song "Better Days" on iTunes. It's really amazing.

Owlsome English

To make my Writing studies more interesting, I'm going to use my new vocab words in an owlsome phrase. Game? Ok, here we go!

Alacrity-
"If Owl City tickets start selling, I'll buy mine with alacrity."

Array-
"I wish I had an array of Owl City albums."

Deduce-
"I can deduce from all the interviews of Adam that he's a real sweet kid. <3"

Encumber-
"I encumber my friends with non-stop talk of Owl City and Adam."

Fraught-
"To make music as a living must have been fraught with doubt at first for Adam."

Haphazard-
"Though most of Adam's lyrics seem haphazard, the way he places his thoughts and the pattern of his music is actually rather ordered."

Incontrovertible-
"My fandom for Owl City is incontrovertible. ;)"

Inexplicable-
"The lyrics of some of the best Owl City songs are quite inexplicable. Take Fireflies, for instance."

Ingenious-
"The flow and beat of Adam's songs are ingenious."

Laggard-
"I am sometimes laggard in leaving the house because I hear an Owl City song playing on the radio and stay to hear the end."

Sustenance-
"Owl City provides sustenance to my musical soul."

Torrid (burning with passion)-
"My love for Owl City is torrid."

Traverse-
"I will traverse the world to meet Adam."

Ubiquitous-
"Owlsome fans are ubiquitous during Owl City concerts."

Zenith-
"Owl City is very near to being at the zenith of his career."

That was awesomely fun.

Owlsome Jenna, out! ;)

True As The Sky

Run up the milky way and show me the stars
Drive through the dark in meteor cars
Trust me to come, I'm as true as the sky.

Glide past the planets, stop when you can
Show me the wonders of this starry land
Bring me along, to hear the stars sigh.

Orbit the sun, leave your shades on,
Don't go away, until hate is gone.
Lead me along, show me the way.

Bring me the stars, luminescent bright,
Bursting in flame, lighting the night.
I will watch on, I will not stray.

Bring out the wine, made from the moon
Drink it until the stars start to swoon
And fall from the sky, in one raining blaze.

Play comets' games, shoot past my view
But don't stray away, I'll be looking for you.
Don't make me look through the Milky Way maze.

Bring me back home, let's take a break,
See I have a thirst that adventures can't slake.
But come back for me, when I start to sigh.

Come like the wind, like you once said,
When you rescued me from the thoughts in my head.
Trust me to come, I'm as true as the sky.

Ahahaha...

While waiting for my friend Nico to be finished with his homework, I was re-reading all my old blogs... I was laughing so hard.
By myself.
Don't worry, the Fort is used to me cracking up alone. :P
Now. To lunch!

Owlsome Post...

This is Blogger. This is me. I don't have much followers.
SO.

Owwwllll Cityyyy!!!!
I've been going on an Owl craze. Listening to his music, watching his old interviews... This is all thanks to http://emptylootbag.wordpress.com/ for introducing me to Adam's music.
The thing about Adam is that his music is... different. He can sing about a thousand bizarre things and still come up with one emotion. (Though I'm not quite sure what emotion I got when I listened to Fireflies)
Another thing that drew me to him (the first thing) was when he sang with TobyMac (The First Noel) and I found out that he was christian. I mean, how cool is that? My respect for him shot up, and I decided to become an Owl.
One of the best decisions of my 15 years.
I really like his old albums, like Maybe I'm Dreaming, Of June, and Ocean Eyes... Of course All Things Bright and Beautiful. The Midsummer Station was the first album I had in my iTouch, but his music had gotten more mainstream.
I realized then that there were "two" Adams. The young one and the older one.
I fell in love with the music and the magic of the younger Adam. His surreality and passion for music drew me to listening to his old albums over and over again. There's always a sense of surprise behind his eyes.
The older Adam's songs make sense. They're not as absurd as the others. He's obtained a more placid personality, where the surprise in his eyes is a bit dulled. I hope he's just trying out this phase and will go to another genre in his next album. Mainstream doesn't fit him.
But I have faith in him. That he would go back to being the Adam who's music I love.

And now. Can I tell you the far-fetched dream of my heart? The echoes of my confession will only resonate around the untouched rooms of my mind... Unless my followers suddenly decide to look at my blog. D:
Ok, here is my dream. I know how to play the violin a bit... I'd like to get better and better at it. It's an instrument I would love to spend time and effort to learn. I was wondering if, when I get really good, Adam would let me play for his band. Just a thought. Why not, right?

............

Music

Born of reverie

Made of air

Wrought of symphony

Strewn with care

Shaped in love

Boundless soul

Gold above

Crack made whole

Seen by all

Felt by few

Like a call

Pure and true

Joy so wondrous

Strength though painless

Hope so ponderous

Beauty nameless

Known by birds

Friend of whales

Without words

Head or tails

Finally named

After thought

Never tamed

Music wrought

The Rat in the Roof

This blog is wholly dedicated to the rat that's been crawling around the ceiling since the monsoon rains. My sister learned that the best way to shoo it of from one part of the roof was to turn on the light that it was nearest to.
We thought it died a long time ago.
But now, three weeks later, I heard it IN MY VERY ROOM and (sorry to say) ran shrieking all the way out. Wouldn't it be horrible if I was lying on my bed thinking about the ways of life and that THING comes crashing down on my face? Eck.
Honestly, though, I wish it would find a way out, because I'm not so keen on having it stink up the whole place when it dies.
I'm so sleepy, but if I turn off the lights, who knows what it'll do? *shudders*
Well, happy night to the rest of you.

Ratomnia = when you can't sleep because of rats

Love Unfathomable

You're here and you're beautiful, you're eyes shine through darkness, you have always been amazing, ever since I made you... You're here and you're marvelous, you're here and I made you, all I want is to be beside you, all I want is to be near you. You're here and you're dazzling, I was happy to make you, you are such a unique person, and I love you. I looked and saw good... I looked and I cried with joy. You were so very indescribable, my vocabulary isn't wide enough. I would never harm you, I will always take care you, I would never never leave you, so why do you shun me? I'll love you forever, you're amazing to me. And I'll tell you that you're beautiful, don't believe what they say. Just listen to me! Please listen to me! I knock but you don't open. I know that you can hear me. I want you to tell me about your troubles, I want you to love me back! But please know I'll never force you. This is all your choice. I'll love you forever, I'll leave you never, for your whole entire lifetime, you'll be never lacking. Oh please let me in now! I'm so eager to meet you! To hear all the things from your lips, not just watching from afar. I just wish that you would know me. I just wish that you would love me! Tears have spilled from eyes, all on your behalf! I sent you my only son, to save a world of pain... I was thinking of you too! You are special to me. Don't let me lose you! I would like you to meet me, see things from my eyes. I would like you to see my love for you. When I made you I was gleeful. You were an angel in my eyes. I shivered with excitement, as I watched you grow.

Now I must cut it off. He has so many things to say, to everyone in the world. If I were to put all He wants to say, this blog would burst. I leave it to you now to find the conclusion to this. :)

As the Monsoon Rains poured down...

It was a Tuesday, August 7, 2012, when we heard that MAPE class was canceled due to the never-ending, gloomy rainfall. We called our neighbors from 8th avenue to see if they were ok, and they told us that their street was already flooded and they were in Galleria. It was then that the final decision was made: we had to go.
Our escape was to my aunt's place. We spent the day watching movie after movie. We watched Staying Alive, with a very, very young John Travolta; part of Friday Night Fever, still Travolta; the first bit of A Walk In the Clouds; Ghostbusters, which was HILARIOUS; Twilight Zone, which I still don't get; and Extremely Loud, Incredibly Close, which was about the cutest thing I ever watched. We took showers (no heater, haha), and went to bed. I woke up sometime early and felt the pinpoints of cat paws walking over my leg. As usual I couldn't go back to sleep. I shifted around a bit, an then wiggled my toes absentmindedly. To my surprise, a cat batted my feet. I looked down and saw my aunt and uncle's Siamese cat, Nadia, looking intently at my covered feet from the bottom of the bed. I played with her some, and then picked her up and put her on my lap. I spent the rest of the time coddling her.
The next day, I and my dad went with my mom to the Fort, and my sister went to help with the relief operations in UAnP. I would be helping out in Victory Fort's operations.
In the afternoon, we called our landlady, and she said that the street was flooding waist-deep, and had entered her first floor. Our house is on a second floor, so we weren't that worried for it. But we couldn't go home. So we spent the night at our friends house. I and their youngest boy have been best friends since birth, so we were just foine. We played Call of Duty Zombie Mode, and I fell in love with an online dude who's account name was RED-AssAssiN_7. He was always protecting me, and he always revived me, whereas he never revived Daniel until it was almost too late. So we played, and played, and kept stoic faces all throughout. UNTIL we saw the cockroach. It was innocently walking, and I and Daniel jumped up like maniacs and stepped away from it quickly. Dane grabbed the cover of Risk and BAM covered it. Thus accomplished, we went back to playing. When we were bored of playing, we would release the cockroach and catch it again with the Cluedo cover. I was horrible at catching, and we had mighty fun that night. We slept at 12-1.
The next day we both helped out at Victory. And that's what I did as the rain fell down. I love the Philippines. :D

Richard Armitage

Richard Armitage rocks my world. XD He's a minor actor who usually has small parts. But finally, the day his fans are all waiting for, he will act in The Hobbit as Thorin Oakenshield, the dwarf leader! Thorin's role calls for dignity and poise, and I'm sure that Armitage will pull it off awesomely. This blog is to Richard Armitage, and to his upcoming fame. ;D

Rants

One thing I hate is inconsiderate people. People who don't care if their actions affect other people. People like that are A-N-N-O-Y-I-N-G. Annoying. The SNAP. Thinking about it makes me want to burst into tears. I also hate bursting into tears. That's why I keep it all in. If I try to say it, I'll most likely cry. Ugh. Annoying life.

Confusedly Simple

Government, the Force, Policemen, and all ranks of power... Sometimes I just want to tell then straight out that what they're doing sucks and that it could be better. It's so easy to fix anything with the government, and concerning a country. So why don't they? People are getting complacent, that's why. Sometimes you just can't wait for someone to take responsibility. Take a look at yourself and realize that you've got the hands to do it! You've got the feet to go! What this world needs are godly people who can hammer self-discipline into the people. What's the harm in BELIEVING? What does it matter if you're rich or not? No matter what, WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE SOMEDAY. So tell me, where would rather go when you die? Where do you want the rest of humankind to go when they die? There are only two choices: Heaven and Hell. So take your pick. For yourself. For the world.

Drum Tao

Omy gulay, Drum Tao was awesome! We watched it in Resorts world for around 800 because we had a student discount. Otherwise it would be around 1000 pesos. We sat at the very back, but we could still see the stage very clearly. The stringed instruments, the flutes, and the DRUMS... they all blended in a throb of awesome music. In the middle if the show, right after the intermission, a Japanese woman came up to us back-seaters and asked us to accompany her to the front rows, which cost 4,500. I and my sister went eagerly enough. We could now differentiate the faces of the drummers. I made this man named Shingo Kawahara my favorite, and Esther hung on to this young really Japanese-looking guy named Junichi Haraguchi. They're actually quite cute names. :3

Captain America Rocks

Did I ever tell you about Ajae? We had the hugest debate about who was better, Iron Man or Captain America. I honestly didn't pick a favorite (even though I was partial to Chris Evans), but when my other friend Glou was defending Captain America from Ajae, I was drawn into the fight. We spent so much time on that debate, staying up until 12 just bashing each other's hero. It was rather refreshing, really. I hadn't a good debate for ever so long. We both got tired of relentlessly refusing to acknowledge one hero as better than the other, so for now the debate is put off. For now. ;)

Portable Blogging

Yay, I can do Blogger on the iTouch! Actually, I do a lot of stuff on this iTouch, especially Twitter. Honestly, it's like texting without a phone. And besides, you can get a direct stream of info from your favorite band/actor etc. Oh, sorry, I know this blog was supposed to be about portable blogging. But Twitter drew me away. Anyway, just to advertise, well, myself, follow me: @CaptRebelSuson. XD

Happy Dappy Mother's Dayee

SO. Mother's Day. Hearts and flowers. Ok, technically, Mother's Day is tomorrow, so that's when I'm gonna give Mum her gift. Nope, I'm not going to tell you what it's gonna be. Such things must be kept secret until the morrow approaches.
Well anyway, today (Sunday) we spent Mother's Day in Eastwood City. We had lunch in Yellow Cab, and then had Cookie Crumble Fraps in Starbucks. Yuuuuuuhhhhmmmmmyyyyy.
Happy Mother's Day mothers! And most of all to my very special Mom, Marmee Janet. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! Thanks for being the best mother in the whole wide world! <3

This is a blog. No, seriously, this is a blog.

So, I haven't been blogging lately, but reading Maximum Ride reminded me that I had such a thing as a blog account. Except, of course, Fang had over 200 million followers, while I have... Four. Pretty liddle, but it'll grow, it'll grow... eventually. In, like, a hundred years, when I'm old and famous. I mean, think about it, when kids a hundred years from now do research on me, it'll be easy to pick out my basic living out of the debris of blogs. Haha, you're probably thinking that I'm really full of myself, but hey, one has to be prepared for all aspects of life. :P
This is Jenna Selim/Hanadar... Sign. Ing. Out.

How to speak German....

I and my groupmates created a script for a play, and I'm supposed to be German. I researched a bit and found out that:
1) "d" is "t"
2) "th" is either "t" (for a sharp "th") or "z" (for a soft "th").
3) "w" is "v"
4) "v" is "f"
5) speak deep in the throat and your "d's" and "r's" will take care of themselves.
I'm finding that it's not that hard after all! ^_^